Pointers on How to Prepare for Marriage
There are lots of things you can do today to make you truly ready for your future marriage. It doesn’t matter if you’re in a serious relationship or not. The sooner you begin this preparation, the better.
These five steps will lead you in the right direction:
Check your habits.
Do you have any habits which you suspect might bring conflict to your relationship with your future spouse? For instance, do you have poor time management skills, or do you typically leave your dirty laundry lying around? If you’re not sure which habits you may have to change, ask your closest family members or friends to help you. But let them talk freely without fear of offending you. Enhance your conflict resolution methods. Your single years are the best time to define your conflict resolution style and how you can improve it. Recall the last two or three times you were in conflict with someone. How did you respond to them? Do you think you could have done anything differently?
Don’t be too hard on yourself.
Everybody has imperfections, including you, so learn to take yourself less seriously. Start with your minor faux pas, like never learning to pronounce certain words right or always losing your car keys. Instead of being angry, try to find humor in the situation and move on. Accepting yourself 100% is not only liberating but quite attractive too.
Find servanthood opportunities.
The best marriages are those where spouses are happy to sacrifice for each other and forget their own needs for the other. While your single, you can learn to develop a sense of servanthood. Search for ways to serve your church or local community. This could mean volunteering to babysit for single mom, driving an elderly neighbor to a friend’s house, or participating in your church’s outreach programs. When you start early with servanthood, it will become a natural part of you when you’re married.
Take stock of your friends.
Finally, It’s important that you have friends who will support you and encourage you to become a good spouse one day. A quick friendship inventory will let you know if you have that kind of friends. You can start by answering a few questions. One, do they think that marriage should be valued? Two, do they treat people of the opposite gender with respect? Three, are they brave enough to correct you when you’re wrong? Maybe they don’t know how they’re coming across. If you tell them that you need their encouragement in certain areas, they may be glad to give it to you. Remember, choosing your friends is not a mistake. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to surround yourself with people who will help you become a better person.